Beauty Pageant Minute--Miss Universe 2012--The "Pageant Bettys" and the "Too Short Gowns" Girls!

Beauty Pageant Minute--Miss Universe 2012--The "Pageant Bettys" and the "Too Short Gowns" Girls!

The Pageant Bettys and the Too-Shorts:

Emerald Queen: Miss Universe South Africa Melinda Bam--Why is she in my "Pageant Betty" group? Read on kiddies... 

Photos Courtesy of MissUniverse.com

Continuing with my Recap of the "Miss Universe 2012 Evening Gown Portraits", in my last post HERE, I talked about my "Good" list--or favorites--and now, it's time to discuss the "Pageant Bettys" of the bunch plus what I call the "Too Shorts". For some explanation, "Pageant Bettys" are the ladies who well, look like a Pageant Betty--meaning the typical Pageant Girl, "done" from head to toe. They are usually wearing mermaid or full-style gowns, in pastel. Sometimes, there is some applique--usually a little "cheap" looking. And a lot of times, they may remind people of grown-up versions of the little girls from TLC's "Toddlers & Tiaras" . The "Too Shorts" are gowns that are, well, TOO SHORT, on the girls. This is a big NO NO in my book. It looks so "off-the-rack" and for a big moment such as the Miss Universe, it's time to get something Custom Made, or at least, get a seamstress to try and fix the situation.  

Now, as I stated in my last post, I realize that:

A) a lot of these girls might have just been handed these dresses and they may--or may not--have had a choice, and...

B) these may not be their actual Evening Gowns that they will wear to the all-important Preliminaries (I hope not, for some!). With all that said...here we go:

Miss Canada Adwoa Yamoah: Here are two fun facts about Adwoa: she's originally from Ghana but moved to Canada at a very young age. And second of all, she was not the actual winner of "Miss Universe Canada" but she was the First Runner Up. The actual winner hurt her foot only days before having to leave for the "Miss Universe 2012" pageant so, as they always say "if for some reason the winner cannot complete her duties..." And so it's Adwoa's time. Now, the gown. It's SO Pageant Betty! She's the QUEEN of Pageant Bettys in this peach-colored Mermaid gown with silver lace applique. There's really nothing wrong with this, except in my eyes, it's way too sweet and typical for such a gorgeous girl. She needs sexy, red carpet FASHIOOON! Please give this gown back to Miss America Alabama. ASAP!

Miss Honduras Jennifer Denise Andrade: Jennifer looks like she is starring in an episode of MTV's "My Super Sweet Sixteen"! She seriously looks like the daughter of a multimillionaire Honduran business man and she's having her Quinceañera. It's not a bad gown by any means. I think the "Barbie Pink" color may be too "cutesy" for her (if it was black or blush it might have helped). And the Prom-like hairstyle makes things worse. Also, it's waaay too long on the petite 5'2" Jennifer. For a girl that little, she does not need such an overwhelming dress.

Miss Angola Marcelina Vehekeni: Huneeeyyyyy!!!! Now here's another perfect example of a "Pageant betty" gown--and entire look--for that matter. Let's begin with the oversized bun hairstyle. Then, the oversized earrings, the strapless gown in a powder blue TAFFETA...with unexplainable creme applique, a cascade down the side front slit and then...is that an illusion panel trying to cover up the too-plunging décolletage area? I want to see this beautiful woman in a more modern style gown.

 

Miss Sweden Hanni Beronius: Another perfect example of a "Pageant Betty" look--but more updated to now. I would deem this "Pageant Betty" Lite. This strapless mermaid shaped gown is actually very nice. The shirred top section looks well made and I like the asymmetrically-cascading bottom-half ruffles. I think it's the pastel-y pink color with the choker of pearls (why??!!) and the dreaded side-swept ponytail hairstyle, that took her into Pageant Betty zone. This gown, in red, with no pearls and a more updated 2012 red carpet hairstyle: Done and done!

Miss Guatemala Laura Godoy: Here's another example of an actually great gown but not-so great styling--in terms of the hair.This silk duchesse (or is it ziberline?) gown looks well made and expensive. The fit is great (except for the too high pleated neckline). It could also double as a beautiful wedding gown--a "Two-for-One-Dress"! What takes to a "Pageant Betty" moment is the hair style (too "Sweet Sixteen") and the vanilla color of the gown. This gown in black with a modern hairstyle:  Más Bueno!

Miss Philippines Janine Marie Tugonon: This gown is very pretty--delicately pretty in fact. It reminds me of a modified Sari. I think the bright canary yellow color plus the scroll-y applique with lace overlay is what puts her in the Pageant Betty category. This is a gown that would work for the "Miss World" pageant where they like their girls sweeter. But for "Miss Universe", I'd rather see Janine Marie is something more red carpet fab with a little bit of sex appeal!

Miss Great Britain Holly Hale: What most puts Holly in this "Pageant Betty" category is her side swept hairstyle--plus the cascading iridescent POLY organza ruffles on the bottom half of this dress. First, make her hair straight, polished and modern. Next, I'd like to remove those poly organza ruffles and just take the top golden sequin portion to the floor. No need for the mermaid shape, no need for poly iridescent organza cascading ruffles. A simple column shaped gown in the silver/golden sequin equals a gown winner!

Miss Singapore Lynn Tan: The positive is that I like the color--it's like muted coral. The sequin detail is nice as well. But it's the organza (or is it tulle?) overlay in the back plus the darkened gunmetal sequin waist detail, and finally her "Pageant Betty" hairstyle that landed the very pretty Lynn here in this category.

Miss China Diana Xu Jidan: Diana is one of my favorites of all the 89 contestants this year. She has the height (almost 6 feet tall!), the perfect figure, the model-like look Miss Universe Organization likes; all of this combined can take her to the end. I was disappointed, however, when I saw her in this gown. It's not a bad gown, it's just a little "Pageant Betty" predictable. It's a little"Mother-of-the-Bride" to be honest. After all, this is what she is supposed to be wearing as her National Costume:

Guo Pei Haute "1002th Arabian Night" Spring/Summer 2010 Haute Couture collection---In other words, I'm expecting COUTURE darling! I hope she wears something else for the Preliminaries. Here's a suggestion of a gown from the same designer:

 Actress Li Bingbing in Guo Pei at the 2010 Venice Film Festival

Miss El Salvador Ana Yancy Clavel: Why are there poly organza faux flowers on this dress? I just want to know. And how, in the Pageant God's name is this supposed to be "Miss Universe" crown material? The very pretty Ana ends up here in the "Pageant Betty" category, first for the color of this gown--this bright canary yellow is very impacting but can veer into "Pageant Betty" in a split second. But it's more the flower detail and side chiffon layers which really put the nail in the coffin.

Miss Poland Marcelina Zawadzka: Marcelina is so beautiful--she looks like a tall (she's almost six feet!) version of one the Olsen twins! I'm sure she--and her pageant directors--wanted to highlight her super long legs in one form or another--but not with the usual HOOCHIE slit gown (that's on a later posting!). So she wore this sea-foam blue-green gown with an iridescent over-skirt. It's the IRIDESCENT OVER-SKIRT that gets me. She looks sweet and great from the waist up. Then it goes into Pageant Betty.

Miss South Africa Melinda Bam: Even though Melinda is short (by recent "Miss Universe" winners standards where the average height in the last nine years has been around 5'10"). Melinda is 5'7" according to this), she's still being considered as THE FAVORITE to win the crown on December 19th. She is stunning, impacting and has that "I'm both Sweet...and SEXY" Miss Universe quality. Now, let's discuss the gown. And it is A GOWN! I was a bit torn by this one. I almost put it in my "best" but then, the iridescent emerald organza over the satin and diagonal sequin detail plus the "Cathedral"-like train...all those things took it to a "Pageant Betty" Diva level. The pose, is A+. I give her that. She's stealing someone's boyfriend...and girlfriend, with that look!

Miss Norway Sara Nicole Andersen: First of all, Sara Nicole is gorgeous. Love her olive skin color as well as her hair. She's so Latina. And yet, she's from NORWAY! The gown is Pageant Betty on Testosterone; it's a strapless sequin bodice gown with a high-low shredded organza attached skirt that ends in a train. In peach. And are those sequins strewn throughout the gown skirt? Seriously. How could this gown NOT end up under "Pageant Betty" !? It's the store-bought version of...

The gown designed by Venezuelan pageant go-to fashion designer Gionni Straccia, worn by Ivian Sarcos when she won the "Miss World 2011" title (above).

The Too-Short Gown Girls:

Miss Lebanon Rina Chibany: Rina, Rina, Rina...why darling? Not only is this black jersey dress too short on you, then you go ahead and wear some 7" platform heels with it...to emphasize the fact that the dress is too short. Gowns should NEVER show the shoes, they should always hit 1/2" above the floor if not TO THE FLOOR. It's a cute dress--to go to a club in Miami, but not to use as your "Miss Universe 2012 Evening Gown Portrait".

Miss Denmark Josephine Hewitt: Josephine is one of the most beautiful girls in the pageant. She's got very classic, very "Hollywood" face structure and looks. Once again--like Miss Universe Lebanon--this is a gown that works for a pool party at the Delano in Miami--but not the Miss Universe 2012 Pageant. It is about FIVE inches too short on one side and about a FOOT too short on the other. And then she wears these stacked platform silver heels on top of it; accentuating the very obvious fact that the dress is too short. If she would have worn strappy heels with NO platform, she would have been fine!

Miss St. Lucia Tara Carla Edward: Tara Carla is simply beautiful--and tall (5'11"). This is why this store-bought gown ended up being too short on her. And this is why, she should have gotten a custom-made gown that was made for her height! Here's a lesson in store-bought floor-length gowns: manufacturers make gowns long enough for a 5' 7" woman. It's a "rule" in the fashion industry. So...if you are shorter than that, the gown will be too long, if you are around that, perfect. If you are above that...you get a "High Water/Flood" gown. And this is what happened. Ladies: PAY for a CUSTOM GOWN. The Cheap comes out EXPENSIVE, as Judge Marlyn Milian says: "Lo Barato sale CARO!".



***Next Up: The "Slit Queens" and "Cha-Cha Love" Evening Gown Recap of the Miss Universe 2012 Evening Gown Portraits

Project Runway Season 10 Recap: "Where's Joan Rivers When You Need Her?"

Project Runway Season 10 Recap: "Where's Joan Rivers When You Need Her?"

Where's Joan Rivers?

Oh Joan, I Wish You Were The Judge: Joan Rivers E! Fashion Police

This week's Project Runway Season 10 Challenge was to Create a Red Carpet Look to be worn at the Emmy Awards. The official name of the challenge was the LEXUS Team Challenge--hello, the show has to pay the bills!

Car Style: Mentor Tim Gunn tries to keep a straight face (no pun intended) as he announces the "LEXUS" involvement in this challenge

Somehow they created an addendum to the challenge that would somehow make it justifiable for LEXUS to be involved--yes, kids, the designers were "inspired" by the colors of these fab LEXUS GS automobiles...yeah, right. This season's designers were given their Red Carpet clients and no, it was't Sofia Vergara or Claire Danes.

Not so muchey as I like to say. Remember the mustard-mess of a dress Season 1's Wendy Pepper made for Nancy O'Dell (photo above). Yeah, bless O'Dell's heart--she smiled through it and was a good sport but you know she was like "NEVER AGAIN!".

Instead, it was former Project Runway contestants and/or winners--such as Laura Bennett from Season 3, Kenley I-threw-a-cat-at-my-boyfriend Collins from Season 5 (above), Irina (Season 6 Winner), Anya (Season 9 Winner) and several others. Let's just get to the Runway darlings, shall we:

Nina, Michael Heidi, and guest judge, actress Krysten Ritter were there and really--nothing against the lovely Miss Ritter--but I was hoping it was going to be Joan Rivers. She would have let these Season 10 contestants HAVE IT. Especially those who were all "I HATE designing 'Red Carpet'..." Yes, I am talking to you Alicia and Raul!

Anyhow, Miss Klum walked out in a strapless sequin LBD with a wink-and-a-smile secretly saying "THIS is a Red Carpet dress kids! Now, go home!" Speaking of Red Carpet dressing and the Emmys--here are the Best Dressed of 2011 as a refreshner:

2011 Emmy Awards Best Dressed

My favorite was the silver silk charmeuse gown that Dmitry and Melissa created for "Kelly Osborne 2.0" April Johnston (above). Somehow, this ended up in the "middle" and not as one of the top two. What gives? Maybe Heidi, Nina, Michael and Krysten were too tired and "over it" (some of those judging sessions go on 'till the wee hours darlings!)

Four Inches Too Short Wedding Dress: Bitchy McBitchy Gunnar and Kooan created this white gown for Irina and somehow this ended up in the Top Two.  You can read my Recap at the end of this post to really know what I think of this dress...

This was the Winner (above left photo)--a short navy blue silk gazar cocktail dress from Ven and Fabio--for "I Want ALL the Attention" Kenley Collins. It was very pretty and expensive looking but Emmys worthy? Go back to that collage of Emmys 2011 Best Dressed...

Is That Your Pageant Britney? Season 9 Winner Anya and Miss District of Columbia USA 2012 Monique LaShone Thompkins

The Bottom Two were cutie (I am renaming him "Drama Queen Christopher" after this episode) Christopher and Andrea BA MA MFA Katz and the design they created for Anya. I do LOVE a pageant gown and a slit--as long as it's not DANGEROUSLY close to her nether-regions--and this dress was. Poor Anya would have been SLAMMED by the "Fashion Police" --or at least moi on TV Guide's Emmys Fashion Wrap!

But the worst was the dowdy dirndl halter dress that pointy-haired Raul and dreadlock'ed Alicia created. Bad with a Capital "B". Poor Mila. This look really aged her and made her look like a Mother-of-the-Bride as opposed to a Red Carpet Diva.




If you want to know what I REALLY thought of this last episode? Read below:

"Where's Joan Rivers When You Need Her?"



 Team I-Don't-Want-To-Be-On-A-Team


We knew it was going to be a KRAZEE episode the minute Tim Gunn said
that this was a "Team Challenge." No One. I reiterate, NO ONE, likes the
Team Challenges on "Project Runway" (except the viewers). The challenge
this week? To create a red carpet look that is to be worn at the Emmys
in September. Lest you forget, our little ol' show is nominated this
year! This challenge was also dubbed the "LEXUS Team Challenge" because
the designers also had to incorporate the colors of the new LEXUS GS
cars (the automobile sponsor) into their red carpet creations. I almost
wished they had to make these looks out of actual LEXUS car parts! But
oh wait, I think that's already been done...



 

Red Carpet Sacrificial Lambs


Seven Teams of two were created — Christopher/Andrea, Sonjia/Nathan,
Elena/Buffi, Ven/Fabio, Gunnar/Kooan, Alicia/Raul and Dmitry/Melissa.
Now, who would these teams be designing Emmys red carpet creations for?
Heidi? Nina? Sofia Vergara?! Nope, darlings. Remember the debacle years
ago when Season 1 Winner Jay McCarroll created La Klum a gown for the
Emmys and she ended up not wearing it? (Oops). And the mess Wendy Pepper
made for Nancy O'Dell to wear to the Grammy's as a result of a
challenge she won? Yeah, in other words, not such a good history of
these collaborations. So, instead, the show brought back seven past
Runway contestants and winners — Season 9 Winner Anya, Season 6 Winner
Irina, Laura Bennett, Kenley, Mila, April Johnston and Valerie Mayen
(who?) — to be the Red Carpet Sacrificial Lambs ... I mean clients.




 

Time Complainer, Hissy Fits, Ironing Assistants


Team Elena/Buffi got Laura Bennett as their red carpet client which
immediately scared me. If Laura and those two were the last people stuck
on an island, she still wouldn't choose them to make her a dress (But,
alas, she has no choice). Laura is elegant Manhattan chic, while Elena
is Lady Gaga futurama and Buffi is just tacky-licious. Strong-headed
Elena is delegating Buffi to steaming/pressing assistant status while
she's just running around stressed and panicked. She's also complaining
about the lack of time they are given to make an evening dress. Really
Elena? What part of "Project Runway" did you NOT understand? These kids,
they slay me.



Click HERE to continue reading...

And make sure to let me know YOUR "Two Cents"" on the site--I read ALL your comments!!! 

Pageant Minute: Miss World 2012--World Fashion Designer Award Competition--The "Oh Dear"!!!

Pageant Minute: Miss World 2012--World Fashion Designer Award Competition--The "Oh Dear"!!!

Beauty Pageant Evening Gown "Oh Dear"!

Where Is Miss Mongolia On This List? Keep Reading...

If you're an avid pageant-watcher (and if you are reading this, you probably are), you know that the 62nd Annual Miss World contest is happening in Ordos Inner Mongolia China and the Final Live Telecast will take place in a couple of weeks on August 18th.

Well kids, it's here--my Nick "Oh Dear, What was SHE Thinking?" List of Gowns from last week's Miss World 2012 "World Fashion Designer Award Competition. In the last post here on my little ol' blog, I talked about some of my favorites in the bunch. So, now...let's get to the CHA CHA, too-high SLITS, Is-This-a-National-Costume-or-an-Evening Gown?, "Big Bird" inspired Feathered MESSES:



Cha Cha Queens:

Miss Costa Rica Silvana Sanchez: No, no and NO! (I think that is UNIVERSAL in every language). I want to put a big banana-and-pineaple Carmen Miranda turban atop her head to just finish this ensemble off. That's what she is missing. Score: 4.5 (out of 10 in case you are wondering)

Miss Bosnia and Herzegovina Fikreta Husic: Havana Cuba, here I come!! Or is it Rio?? Remove those tacky hem-piped ruffles on that over-the-shoulder capelet and change those 1988 pumps, and then, maybe then, we can discuss...Score: 5.0

Miss Serbia Bojana Lecic: OK, first off: she's GORGEOUS. But this gown. Who. Puts. WIRING on the hem of a ruffled high-low gown like this? She's not a Circus Clown from Cirque du Soleil! And then, what is hanging off her shoulder? It's called EDIT! How do you say "Poor Thang" in Serbian? Score: 4.9

Miss Bulgaria Gabriela Vasileva: Little PEACH Bo Peep Stripper Fab. That's what I would call this dress. Last year's Miss World, Ivian Sarcos of Venezuela, won in something that was (somewhat) similar to this, so she probably felt "Hey, I want something like this" and told her designer to create it. Bad idea. The oversized earrings and stripper platform heels did not help. Score: 5.5



The HOOCHIE Awards Go To:

Paris and Snookie: Miss Kazakhstan and Miss Belgium

First, let's begin with Miss Kazakhstan Evgeniya Kleshina (left pic above). This red lace and feathered mermaid-style gown with silver bust cups is a HOOCHIE fab. It's NOT the Las Vegas AVN Porn Awards huney, it's MISS WORLD! Those platform heels SLAY me. So tacky. Score: 4.5



Miss Belgium Laura Beyne: I'm sure Laura is a sweet girl but why did she think Snookie from Jersey Shore was an Evening Gown Muse?  I cannot say more. Score: 4.9

She Didn't Even Try Award Miss Slovakia Kristina Krajcirova: Poly-satin strapless gathered gown with badly-constructed rippling hem.This is a gown one would see at a prom-and-bridal shop, for 75% off. Score: 4.5


  

Too Muchey Award Miss Honduras Jennifer Valle: Let's just throw everything AND the kitchen sink...into a gown. Can you just imagine if this ended up on the Project Runway catwalk in front of Michael Kors and Nina Garcia? Or on an award show red carpet? Plain and simple, it's CHONCHEE! (Latino for TACKY!). Score: 4.9



Feathered Messes:

Guadeloupe and El Salvador

Miss Guadeloupe Brigitte Golabkhan (left): is so beautiful I can't even breathe. However, she chooses to wear this black and magenta satin and feathered concoction of a gown to the Miss World "World Fashion Designer Award" Competition last week, and well, her beauty stock for me, just went down. Score: 5.2



Miss El Salvador Maria Luisa Vicuna (right): Too much lace, too many feathers, and then the mermaid shape. She was trying for a Beyonce-at-the-Met and well, she achieved a gown in a San Salvador Drag Show. Score: 5.0

The Bahamas and Ukraine

Miss Bahamas Daronique Young (left): I give her points for the "I'm a Mermaid Princess" look. She does look kinda HOT in this two piece ensemble. But, isn't this more of a costume than an evening gown? How many peacocks did it take to make this gown? Score: 6.0



Miss Ukraine Karina Zhyronkina (right): Let me begin by saying that she is STUNNING! She should either win Miss World 2012 or at least be on the Final podium (it's like the Pageant Olympics!). But this gown. There's something both beautiful (the sequin detail looks expensive and I like the black and blue color combination) but...the feather applique and side cut-outs on the torso, it all adds to a dress one would see atop a Gay Pride float. Score: 7.0

Rosette Queens: Indonesia and Uganda

Miss Indonesia Ines Putri Tjiptadi Chandra: If this gown was placed in front of Michael Kors on Project Runway, he'd say she looked like she was POOPING feathered rosettes. Score: 4.8



Miss Uganda Phiona Bissu:  Awww, bless her little heart. Miss Uganda's gown reminds me of those dresses that are made entirely of toilet paper... I really wish there was something more I could say. Score: 4.5



National Costume Awards:

Miss Kenya Shamim Nabil: OK, maybe I am confused. I know that the Miss World "World Fashion Designer Award" is about highlighting the fashion design talent of the contestant's nations. So...is this also the National Parade of Nations Costume Parade? Can it be too redundant for a "Miss Kenya" to be wearing animal print safari as an evening gown? I think even the safari tourists would run away from this. Score: 5.0

Miss Cote d'Ivoire Helene-Valerie Djouka: Because she looks so darn cute, I am giving her points. Otherwise, on any one else, this still would be a pseudo-costume mess of an orange dress. And is that an iridescent poly organza overlay?? NOOOO!!!! Score: 6.4



And My Favorite of the Group:

Miss Mongolia Bayaarma Huselbaatar: I don't even know where to begin with this one. But I'll try. Bayaarma gets MAJAH "Nick Points" in the "Bringing Out Your Inner Drag Queen" part of working a runway catwalk. This gown/costume is rather FAB in a kooky way. The headdress is very John Galliano for Dior "Tutankhamen" Collection from back in the day.  

For ALL of this, I give her my Score of 8.0. It's a MESS but a mess that makes a gay man smile.